I posted a dance last week, that unexpectedly got a big response. I never know if a dance is going to be interesting or will draw people in, but this one did, was it the dance? was it the dress? was it the song? was it the words I wrote under it? I actually thought when I posted it that it would be one of the ones that didn’t really get seen. I did it really quickly, about to collect kids from school, I didn’t watch it back, I just posted it with the words.. (which happens a lot, the ones I think will be unnoticed are the most popular.. where people engage with me and talk about it.. what’s that about mmmmm )?
I think, maybe it was all of the above! Sometimes its a magic combination of all 4 elements..
The idea of getting to know your medicine, to be your medicine, that you are a medicine woman was what was reflected to me in the comments most.
What is Medicine? Another way to put it could be your gifts, your aura, what you bring to what you do, who you are, what people feel when they are with you, what magic you bring, what you carry in your medicine bundle.
A medicine woman might be a healer, a plant sister, an energy worker, a midwife. These are more traditional ideas for the term. I also believe there are as many kinds of medicine as there are people. Each person has a special, individual flavour to their magic that is there whether they know it, and use it, or not.
I didn’t really feel I had any special medicine until I dreamed into this idea. I’m not a healer, midwife, holder of a great amount of plant wisdom nor do I do any traditional forms of energy work. I had a feeling, like with most things in my life up until I was around 35, that I was a beginner, a baby in these realms, I didn’t honour anything I am or do as anything special because it wasn’t recognised with a label or title, I couldn’t even put it into words!
About five years ago now Julia Inglis of Sacred Familiar came to teach the graduates of the School of Shamanic Womancraft, for a Deepening weekend. We did all sorts of amazing things, past life journeys, reclaiming the witch, connecting with our gypsy souls and finding our medicine. It was a huge weekend.
There is always a common thread in my past life journeys. I’m always alone. Often outcast because of what I knew, what work I did, because I was hiding, because I was in danger, because I was powerful.
So maybe, thats why now, what I am and who I am is undefinable in this life time? It keeps me safe. I can actually be anything I need to be in any situation to best survive.
When we did our Medicine process, a journey, I had such high expectations for what I would find. Certain I would be a fire witch (even though I’m almost entirely water and air) or get some title I could claim. My ego was ready for some definition of my description!
The medicine I found I have/am is love, beauty and joy.
I was pretty annoyed at the time that I didn’t get a title..
I have many many titles I can put to what I do~ Shamanic Craftswoman, Mother, Doula, Ceremonialist, Water Witch, Dancer, Singer, Holder of Space, Womens Mysteries Teacher.. and in all of these roles I am bringing my medicine of love, beauty and joy.
How that is expressed is always changing.
I was a bit embarrassed about beauty being in there to start, only because I thought people would think I thought by being there and looking beautiful I was adding something! I felt the need to explain that beauty is a feeling, a grace, peace, colour, sacredness and acceptance of the moment, no matter what that moment may be, a birth, a death, a dance, a ceremony, a difficult time, a transition into the next evolution.
My teacher Jane Hardwicke Collings shared with me upon hearing of my unenthusiastic meeting with my medicine…. her teacher and friend Jeannine Parvati Baker, said to Jane on her death bed, that she knew what the meaning of life was… to bring beauty.
That cured me of any disappointment.
And the more I think of it, the more I know that this medicine I hold is because of all the lives I’ve had, including this one, all the lessons, and strategies and gifts to protect myself from being persecuted and outcast.
For in this life time, I am not alone.
In love, beauty and joy